Welcome, Void Dweller
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Battery Mouth
electric pylon rammed down their throats
chew it slowly else...
Salt of the Sea
i am thirsty like the salt of the sea
let me unscrew your neck...
Ignorant Bastards
bald headed, red faced
ale drinking, small thinking, nation of pigs...
The Moscow Mule
the moscow mule trudges through the mud
torn up by tank shells ...
Bamboo Cover
when i was nine
my school had a book competition
who could write the best book...
Maggots for Poems
i got stuck cleaning maggots
instead of writing poetry
all the kettle water in the world...
Still Wanker
his father was a tool maker
and make a tool he did...
Spoons
table and menu
sticky and wet, time to leave?...
Bin Day
i put the bins out
for collection; the bin man...
Pathetic
i am a tornado when you scream
my mouth contorts into a gust of acid...
Words in my Mouth
i'm a beating heart
that my words wrap around like...
Speak Betterer
don’t say “arse”, say “bottom”
don’t say “pissed”, say “slightly perturbed”...
On Maslow
maslow's hierarchy of
needs is bollocks; i...
The Almighty Shopping List
this is the almighty shopping list.
5 grenade launchers...
Boys Will Be...
boys copying their dads
leads to girls crying in their mums laps...
Sunk
a ship with holes takes
a while to sink; sink it does...
Metaphors for Serious Shit
“Kulak, why don’t you use metaphors?”
Fuck me, I’ve heard that one before...